Tuesday, June 15, 2010

What do you think about Ass licking... yeah thats right WTF is whats in my head!

I dont get it... some girls and their fascination of wanting to lick the brown hole WTF why would you want to lick someone in their right out tiny asshole when the greatest place on earth is like a millimeter away! NO I will not let you lick my ahole even if you insist that we shower first!

Thursday, June 10, 2010

132 lbs. Doughy Girl Sexual Intercourse, Alcohol Malfunction Erection, Cream Pies

So alot of people have been asking me about my closing stories, WARNING this stuff extremely raw and raunchy maybe a little TMI but since no one really talks about their true experience here is my NC23 version (i guess its beyond 17 because im 23... anyways irrelevant) so here is one of my stories that i blogged about in a community forum. STOP reading here if you are one to be offended but if open minded than read on and enjoy.


132 lbs. Doughy Girl Sexual Intercourse, Alcohol Malfunction Erection, Cream Pies

It’s been a while that I’ve posted, I usually don’t post but want to know if this is normal or not... I may start posting more soon

I know this is pretty embarrassing but it’s probably happen to a few of you guys out there.

"Doughy girls" not fat but PHAT- Prettty-Hott-And-Tenacious women sometimes aren’t really that bad. As I usually don't drink well just sometimes but rarely. I’ve found that when I am drunk my egg roll can’t stand up straight and I’ve noticed this on several occasions, it’s so weird!... Normal or not?

(This girl did not know who I was being the fact that I was on the pickup artist show which was awesome)

Opener: Your fucking adorable (direct)....I can shake my A-S-S ASS better than you (playful/body rock), she started laughing.

(Saw that she had a big ass)... started bumping and grinding and literally picked her up and carried her to this chair that looks like a honey comb (isolation) dropped her down and started making out with her. (Was surprised cuz I did not build comfort what so ever)

Her friend comes over and tries to pull her out (interrupt) so I befriend her put her in the honey comb chair with her other friend and gave them both lap dances. After she knew that her girl friend was okay and cool with me she got up and walked to her other friends.

Time frame 11pm -Midnight

Anyways getting to the point I met this doughy girl (not fat but I guess they call them thick about 130lbs, 5'7) had an amazing time with her. I was giving her lap dances she gave me a few and nearly crushed my dick cuz her ass was so meaty, but after having a few shots I just couldn't get my fucking dick up (I usually don't drink). All the cock teasing was like a shiatsu massage on my back but this time it was on the jingle balls that so felt good. She was cute and I was actually turned on but just couldn't get it up.

At this point I knew she was comfortable and felt that I could do anything to her and she would let me, so I lightly caressed her cleavage and she didn't say anything to stop me, I continue to Kino plow her and pulled her right breast out of her top I than started sucking on her tits and her nipple (tasted like aquafina in my head) I said "you must shower in some filtered water" she laughs and I told her that her nipples taste like Aquafina!

Bouncing to another location.....

So I told doughy girl that I was craving for some Froyo let go get some... and she was hesitant because she didn't want to leave her girl friends, I told her we'll go for 15mins its right down the street on Hollywood blvd. so she agrees, I take her to go get some froyo, caressing her ass on our walk there (she was wearing a pretty short skirt) had my hands over her ass and I say this ass is for my hands and eyes only next time when were out your covering up its only for my eyes and yours. We get there and the place is closed.

Than we walk back to my minivan, yes I drive a soccer mom. We start making out, I give her a back massage and tell her that I’m going to give her a full body massage she says> we should drive somewhere dark, so I drive to a dark residential area.
Hoping the alcohol would wear off as she jacks off my pink egg roll with her mouth she was going at it for nearly 45 minutes and I still couldn’t shoot out any yogurt. then she tried jacking me off with her hand this time and I was starting to get hard but for some reason I could not cum (I think I might of jacked off the night b4 + alcohol = stiff cock but no cum) from her right hand it was about 15 minutes she asked if I was almost about to cum and I said no.

She was getting tired and had to switch to the left hand, another 20 minutes go by and I’m starting to get hard like a missile. So I popped it in her sausage wallet and poked her about 67 times where I was about to shoot my load. I felt so good at this point but I didn’t want to cum so early even though we've been at it for an hour or so. I pull it out of her pussy and she says "Oh my God you are Asians amazing fuck me" than I said "I’m not god I’m Brian, say oh my Brian" (got this from D.Wygant) than she told me to shut up and just fuck her. For 5 minutes I made out with her and had my cock in between her pussy lightly slapping her clit with my stone hard dick.

Every time I make out with her I would do EPS on her (I have to say thanks to Neil who personally showed me how to do this) cuz this works 100% of the time during deep sexual escalation to turn on her erogenous zones on.

I ask her where she likes getting ejaculated on and she says "idk anywhere" so I said "I’m going to give you a cream pie" (I did not know cream pie meant shooting in the mouth and had always thought it means shooting in the face). I’m still stiff at this point so I pull her hair and she goes back down to sliding her tongue like a tornado around my dick for another 7 minutes and boy was I about to burst a hurricane Katrina out of my cock, so I pull it out of her mouth and I super soaked my hummus looking cum on to her face. Then she wipes it off her face and slathers it on her tits. At this point I softened up and was about to fall asleep all sweaty and exhausted.

It was about 2am she had a bunch of missed called and text from her girl friends. So she called her gf’s and tells them everything’s okay and we went to the front of the club to go pick her friends up, dropped her girl friends at their car and I invited them to Monterey Park (great place for amazing Asian or American gourmet food for half the price of Mel's Diners) for late night grub they came with us and we all ate and talked it was a little weird cuz her friends knew we had sexual intercourse and they kept on giving me weird dirty looks turns out one of her girl friends know who I was and calls me out and I was like okay you got me! But it was all good at the end of the night. What an adventure!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Monday, April 5, 2010

SEX Why Such a BIG Deal?

The first thing i want to say is i've lived a really sheltered life because of my family's religion and i don't think that's healthy. i think teens need to experiment with sex because sex is NATURAL for all of us. Plus it's a lot of fun yeahhh :-) Sex should be experimental and fun, not so serious as some people act like it is. Its just two people having a good time and exploring each other. theres no 'right or wrong' and its not 'bad' no matter what nuns and priests...That's all I'm gonna say about sex for right now .. maybe ill post some more thoughts tho

So i met Josyln James aside from what is being said about her in the media shes a normal person just like everyone else. I hung out with her and a few friends at the Rainbow in LA. Josyln is super down to earth and real!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

I Won a Soup Awards & My Guest Appearance

The Soup Awards 2009 Outstanding Achievements In Desperation Non Vehicular 2.20.09




My biggest fan Joel McHale

Chet Canon from the Real World Boston

My Guest Appearance Fox Reality Binge





So i got invited to do a guest appearance of Fox's Reality Binge in LA, it's just another version of the soup. Reading off the teleprompter was not easy, production kept on calling cut on me, srry guys im not an actor but i had a blast doing this skit. Believe it or not i was nervous as shit, even after being on a reality tv show, im just no good in front of cameras, well i guess that's one thing i need to work on!

The Soup Clipdown 12-19-08

What have i done...I am dumbfounded, Joel McHale simply loves my ass commenting about me after every episode i survived!

The Soup: PUA2-My Elimination 11/14/08


Sad news everyone - our friend Brian was kicked off this week. He seems to have learned so much and is now better equipped to take on the world. Let's see what he says about it.

The Soup: PUA2-Brian-"I Grabed a Boob & Ran away" 11/7/08

This week on the Pickup Artist - Mystery taught the guys how to touch women in a very pleasant way. But first, Mystery needs to know what kind of experience they had beforehand. Let's hear how far Brian went in touching women.




The Soup: The Pickup Artist 2-Brian-W-O-W- WOW! 10/31/08

W-O-W- WOW! I made it on the Soup Again, what a surprise! Ive been getting w-o-w messages and comments all week long. I thought people were spelling wow because I am A-W-E-awesome! Really I didn't realize I said that until I watched the episode over again hahaha....


My random line "Smokin Balls" made it on E! Network The SOUP

Joel McHale, the host of television's The Soup by E!, talks about Mystery and episode 1 of the PickUp Artist. Very funny stuff and the random things i said.

My "Smoking Balls" line made it on Jimmy Kimmel

Pickup Vocab - Brian Ly's MySpace Blog |

Pickup Vocab - Brian Ly's MySpace Blog |

Asian Men & Penis Size



I was cruising the some forums while watching television...... and I'm sick of all these bullshit stereotypes about Asian men........ but the one that upsets me the most is PENIS SIZE!!! The most common stereotype is "ALL ASIAN MEN HAVE TINY PENISES"....

Not all Asian men have small penises..... some Asian men have large penises.... some Asian men have average penises......

It's the same for EVERY race and nationality....

So not one to talk shit without first backing it up, I will inform you of the thickness and length of MY penis

the size of my erect penis is 5 inches long and 5 inches in diameter.... I had measure it with a tape measure a couple years back because I read somewhere that your penis gradually starts to lose it's size after age 21, so I wanted to measure it before it got any smaller, lol.

A few pictures were taken of the measurement WITH the tape measure against the entire length of my erect penis AND around the diameter right below the "helmet".... just so when my penis withers away, I can look back at the pictures and say, "Where the hell did the rest of my c*ck go?" I have shown those pictures to a few of my VERY BEST FRIENDS and closest family members just for witness 'cause I'm weird and anal like that, lol!

Now a 5" x 5" erect penis isn't huge..... but it certainly isn't tiny.... thus discrediting the stereotype that ALL Asian men have tiny penises

You may have a larger penis than me….. you may have a smaller penis than me…… you may be the same size as me…… the only one that really cares is you

A lot of people think 8 inches is average..... I USED to think 8 inches was average.....

then I took a Sex Ed class in college found out that the average erect penis is just over 5 inches long and 4.5 inches in diameter....

Now if you do not fall within "average", don't feel insecure..... another thing I found out is that the female species only has nerve endings that feel pleasure 4 inches into her vagina.....

I WISH I KNEW THIS GROWING UP!!!!Thank goodness for sexual education classes…. Thank goodness for the internet…. Thank goodness for GOOGLE!!!

Most of all THANK GOODNESS FOR WOMEN, because without women….. men wouldn't need a penis….. =P